Pain
by 2CrzY4U
Summary: Dark fic. Blue can't seem to remember when she was happy. Ever since Green left her, everything hurts. She just wants it all to end. Character death suicide R&R T for a reason, guys. Manga verse.


**Here's a warning: This is a pretty dark fic. It has character death (suicide), and a pretty sad Blue. To be clear, Blue is the girl, Green is the guy. The 'she' is Blue, the 'he' is Green, and he 'old friends' are Yellow and Red. Don't yell at me for bolding and the italics, it's meant to put emphasis on the meaning of the fic. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, nor do I hate Blue because I'm killing her off. NO. I thought she showed how a once cheery person can drastically change because of love.**

**ON WITH IT!**

_She doesn't believe in true love. _

_Not anymore._

_She knows that isn't fair, though._

_Not fair to her old friends, who are falling hard, she knows._

_But that can't stop the sour taste from coming to her mouth when they kiss. Can't keep the nightmares away from her sleep. Can't help push the memories out of her thoughts. _

_Memories of when she, too, was happy._

_When she would be working with him in the lab, listening to the radio late at night. The notes of a slow song – their song – flood her thoughts and now she's thinking about when that same song came and he stopped everything to ask her to dance_.

_How they would swirl around the lab and he would spin her, and she would __**smile**__, feeling like the happiest woman alive. _

_But now __**smiling**__ hurts, so she stops doing it altogether._

_Then all of a sudden, he's __**holding**__ her, and __**kissing**__ her, and __**loving**__ her once more, and she's returning the favor. And for a moment, she finds that happiness might be hers' again. _

_But then she wakes up to the empty space next to her on the bed, and that trace of happiness has disappeared, just as he did._

_So she reaches for the phone to call him, but stops short. _

_Because he's no longer hers to __**hold**__ and __**kiss**__._

_And now, __**loving**__ hurts, so she stops doing it altogether._

_She's losing it, she realizes. _

_As she __**thinks**__ about the past, when she was cheery and loud, and he told her she was __**pesky**__ and __**obnoxious**__, but he loved her anyway, her head begins to ache (not her __**heart**__, she notices, because she's already lost that to him)_

_So now __**thinking**__ hurts, so she tries her best to stop doing it altogether too. _

_Soon, it's all black and white to her._

_She's so out of it, she doesn't care when she wakes up and she can no longer see __**color**__. She doesn't even notice. _

_The __**color**__ always hurt her eyes anyway. _

_The vibrant greens reminded her that other were alive and thriving, while she was slowly wasting away to __**nothing**__. The bright yellows were just that: too bright. They reminded her that others were happy, and she has been __**sad**__ and __**alone **__since he left._

_Such simple colors could do so much damage. It's silly actually, but perhaps that's why she stopped __**seeing**__ the __**colors**__ altogether._

_People once called her beautiful._

_They still do, actually, but she's stopped believing them._

_Her brown hair has lost its' __**life**__, simply hanging over her shoulder uselessly. Her pink lips that often curved up into a playful smirk or an evil grin now remain in a straight line. Even her once captivating blue eyes have lost their sparkle, constantly staring off vacantly at nothing._

_She's lost her __**confidence**__, something he once admired her so much for._

_What's the point of being __**confident**__, anyway? She used to be overflowing with confidence, but not anymore._

_Why? Oh it's simple, really. She got hurt, so she lost her __**confidence**__ altogether. _

_She doesn't even know what she did to hurt him. One day, he just ended it. _

_He had no interest in hearing about what _he_ did to hurt _her_. _

_And now…. Now, being __**hurt**__ seems to be the only thing she can do. _

_She doesn't __**taste**__ the food she puts in her mouth. She doesn't __**smell **__the aroma of the perfume she sprays on herself. The only thing that registers in her mind is that she is miserable._

_**She wants to die**__. _

_The idea is sudden, fleeting, and as soon as it enters her thoughts, it poisons her mind. It's all she can think about, and she doesn't even notice that she's thinking again, even though she told herself to stop doing that._

_Minutes pass, and soon the thought is no longer a thought. _

_It's a __**full-fledged action**__._

_Before she knows it, she's in the kitchen, taking no care not to make noise as she pulled open the knife drawer. She knows what she's searching for. When she sees it, it's found her way into her hands before she has gotten a good look at it._

_A big, sharp thing, showing her the reflection of her lonely self._

_The weapon to __**ultimately **__end her. _

_Of all the things and people that have hurt her, she feels no pain as she presses the blade into her wrist. _

_She allows herself a dry laugh at the irony. Then another. Soon, she's laughing somewhat __**maniacally**__, pressing the knife further into her skin and watching the blood trickle (is that really the color of blood? She hasn't seen it in such a long time, she couldn't tell you what the name of the color is) down her arm in little paths like a waterfall. _

_She drops that knife and it hits the floor with a clatter. She falls with it, a small __**THUD!**__ against the floor that will go unnoticed._

_ It's __**over**__. _

_She's so glad, it's finally over._

The gate to her house opens with an eerie creak. He steps through it, a bouquet of flowers gripped tightly in his hands. He's nervous. Unsure if she'll take him back after he left her with a glance back.

He moves up the walkway to the house, surprised to find the door slightly ajar. He pushes it open further, looking around the foyer for a sign of life. Confused, he moves to walk down the hallway to the kitchen, searching hopelessly for the obnoxious, blue-eyed girl he fell in love with.

Upon turning the corner to the kitchen, his hand flies up to his mouth and he drops the flowers in horror.

He rushes over to girl where she lay unmoving, her eyes wide and her lips parted in a wicked smile.


End file.
